Rico's Ramblings

My answer to the question: what do you do all day?

Naive Latina confuses maitre d’ for elderly playboy millionaire

Linda Maldonado mistakenly confuses a maitre d' for a self made millionaire

Linda Maldonado mistakenly confuses a maitre d’ for a self made millionaire

Portland, OR – The last thing you could accuse Linda Maldonado of being is a gold digger. So when the sexy Latina sidled up to the handsome maitre d’ during a recent night on the town, most onlookers assumed she was just asking for a second salad fork. Come to find out, however, Maldonado had simply confused the man in the tuxedo for a rich playboy.

“I was so embarrassed for her,” said Portland resident Kristi Lemos, who witnessed the event from a nearby table. “Clearly his only means of support was the truss he was wearing inside his trousers.”

As it turned out, the maitre ‘d was no other than Daryle Rico, one of Maldonado’s regular salsa partners. “I didn’t even recognize him,” confessed a blushing Maldonado afterwards. “I didn’t think I’d see him looking that good until he was laying face up in an open casket.”

“Linda is always making that mistake,” said her boyfriend Israel Guerrero. “I once caught her flirting with a parking lot attendant who was wearing the same exact tuxedo – minus the extra-strength cummerbund.”

Rico’s rejection was compounded about an hour later when Maldonado neglected to tip him the customary 15%.

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