Zigzag, OR – What started out as a weekend afternoon to collect firewood turned into an environmental disaster as Jenny Chen and her 3-year old daughter single handedly cleared the southeast side of Mt. Hood. Their afternoon effort left a huge clearcut on the southwest side of Oregon’s most popular mountain, which was visible as far away as Gresham.
“I guess we got a little carried away,” admitted Chen, “but we’ll be saving a bundle heating the house this winter.”
Chen and her daughter cleared a one-day record 400 acres of trees, which is second only to the Mt. St. Helens eruption, which leveled over 60,000 acres.
US Forest Service officials were not impressed with Chen’s afternoon haul. “Holy crap,” exclaimed ranger Daryle Rico. “I’ll be planting seedlings the rest of my life.”
Chen’s efforts reportedly earned her several threats from a number of environmental groups as well as a tersely worded letter from Woodsy Owl. “That bird has a foul mouth,” grumbled Chen.
The environmental disaster was considered an even greater waste when Chen returned home and discovered that she doesn’t even have a fireplace. “I completely forgot we have electric heat,” Chen said sheepishly. “Oops.”